Thousand Miles

Thousand Miles - Caedmon's Call

I have stolen, Lord, let me give

I have left Your house a fugitive

I have wandered in my own way

Squandered everything You gave

But my dying heart You saved and let me live

I have cursed the air and clenched my fists

I have hungered for Your righteousness

I have tried to walk the line

I drew between Your heart and mine

But You forgive me every time the mark is missed

So take my broken offering and make it whole

And set my feet upon the road that leads me home

Let me walk as one fixed upon the goal

Even though I've got a thousand miles to go

I have sought Your grace in my defense

I have plundered Your magnificence

Until my journey is complete

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

That I might sow what I have reaped From Your great love

As I struggle for Your hand

You use me in ways I can't understand

You take this sinful man and renew me

Working through me

I had a really long talk with my mom last night about some stuff that is going on in my life, and she put things into perspective incredibly. I am so blessed with her. But it was also a really humbling talk. I was really disgusted with my prideful and vindictive attitude. I am so far from where I need to be with Jesus. My heart is so far from His. I want His heart. I want to know it and to feel it. I want to care about the things that He cares about. I get so caught up in myself. There's an awesome Hillsong song, Lead me to the Cross, and one of the lines is "Rid me of myself, I belong to You". I want that so much. I don't want me to get in the way of what God wants to do. I want to show his love and compassion and mercy and grace to everyone around me. I am sick of thinking of myself first. It's easy to love those who love us. I want to love those who don't love me.

But I know that through all of this, Jesus is right here with me, forgiving and loving and teaching. It overwhelms me. It is ridiculously humbling. The God of the Universe it with me right now, loving on me. I don't deserve anything from Him, but he gives me everything. Incredible. I have a thousand miles to go, but He is with me every single step of the way.